Everything we do in life is a decision. Very few external circumstances are outside of our domain of choice. You may decry, “But I didn’t decide for that tornado to hit my city!” True. But you did decide to live in that particular location. Tornados, like anything in this world, reside where the environment is conducive to their existence. Put yourself in that environment and be prepared for its arrival, whether you like it or not.
I’ve quipped in the past that I would not voluntarily engage in a boxing match against Mike Tyson. I, like 99% of humans, would be knocked out in a nanosecond. After I regained consciousness, I’d be an idiot to blame circumstance, right? I made my bed, as they say, and I have to lie in it. There’s a reason they call him “Iron Mike,” and not “Cozy Pillow Mike.”
Better decisions = better life
Let’s make better decisions, shall we? But how? Lucky for you (and everyone else) there are ways to make better decisions. I see three obvious ways to go about this. I also see three not-so-obvious ways, which may surprise you.
I won’t go into detail regarding the obvious ways for obvious reasons. However, I’ll expound a bit on the not-so-obvious ways, simply because they may seem odd or counterintuitive.
Three obvious ways to make better decisions
Do a lot of things and learn from your experience
Seek counsel from people who have lived longer and have learned from their experience
Seek out resources from reputable people via books, podcasts, videos, etc.
The above three ways are your basic run-of-the-mill self-improvement modus operandi. All good, of course, but let’s go a little deeper.
Three not-so-obvious ways to make better decisions
1. Have a clear-cut vision of the person you would like to be
Is the person you are right now the absolute best version of yourself? Doubtful. Unless you’re a megalomaniacal narcissist, you probably feel as though you have room for improvement in your life. The problem is, you may not have that “best version of yourself” properly envisioned.
If you are doubtful of the validity of The Law of Attraction, this method is a way of seeing how the law works in a practical way. As you envision the person you would like to be, and really believe that you can be that person, you will naturally begin acting in a way that is aligned with that future version of you… because you are that future version of yourself starting right now. Make sense?
An example would be if you envision yourself as a marathon runner. If you believe that you are a marathon runner, there is no vacillation as to whether to go for a run or not. You run. Easy decision. After making lots and lots of these easy decisions, you’ll end up running that marathon and being that person you envisioned.
Recommended read: "Psycho-Cybernetics" by Maxwell Maltz
Create your own algorithms
This isn’t as nerdy as it sounds. An algorithm is simply a system to do something; a formula. If you’ve ever followed a recipe, you’ve followed something of an algorithm.
Personal algorithms are great because you make the decision beforehand and, when you’re on the spot, you don’t have to think about your situation. It saves time as well.
These don’t have to be complex and they don’t have to follow any sort of specific structure - make them your own! Better still, you can add or subtract from them. For instance, you may create an algorithm for going to a casual social gathering, which might be like this:
I will consider going to the casual social gathering if:
I have no previous engagements
the venue is a 15-minute drive or less from my house
it starts before 9:00 PM
two or more of my friends will be there
If someone were to invite you to a social gathering and it doesn’t fit into the above criteria, it’s an automatic pass. That may sound harsh, but you’re the one who made the algorithm. If you go, you may resent the host. If you don’t like the terms, alter them. In short, you’re creating your own boundaries. Anything outside of your boundaries is a “no.”
Drastically reduce your dopamine hits
Any shortcut to a dopamine hit (e.g., drugs, alcohol, TV, gaming, social media, etc.) has an insidious effect upon us. We dip our toe in such activities and, before we know it, they’re running (or ruining!) our lives.
I know that sounds drastic, but hear me out. If you find yourself getting frustrated with people or circumstances because they’re hindering you from getting your dopamine fix, you may be letting your cravings make decisions for you. What’s worse is, the decision to engage in these activities is an opportunity cost - you’re trading a productive activity for one of consumption.
Chasing a dopamine hit is an epidemic in our western culture and so many of us are making horrible decisions because of it. Cut it back or, better yet, cut it out completely and you’ll find that you make better decisions easily.
Decide to make better decisions
Deciding to make better decisions is at the heart of the matter. Once you decide on something, a certain kind of magic happens. Not to get into the weeds, but everything in our universe is energy. By default, that energy is chaotic until something directs it towards order. When you make a decision, you take on the role of director of your life.
As you make more decisions, you learn to make better decisions. As you make better decisions, your life becomes better all around. It’s a simple concept that can be difficult to master. Don’t let the difficulty sway you. You deserve an awesome life. Decide to have it now.